Chapter 8 Meera - Incarnation of Devotion

8 Meera – Incarnation of Devotion Meera Bai epitomizes Bhakti (devotion). Her unwavering love for her Krishna was the most beautiful. Even Krishna would helplessly be drawn to her. Her conversations with Krishna poured out as poetry, as love songs for the divine (bhajans). For a devotee, all love songs are bhajans (devotion songs), and all bhajans are love songs. Hers are remembered even today. Meera was born in the month of September 1498 to Rani Veer Kumari and Rana Ratan Singh in Kukri, a small town in the kingdom of Marwar of Rajasthan, India. When she was born, her face was as bright as the sun, so the family priest named her ‘Mehra’, or Meera, which means luminous. Her father belonged to the Rathore clan of Jodhpur. Rao Jodha, who established Jodhpur, was Meera’s great grandfather. Her grandfather, Dudaji (Rao Duda), established the princely state of Medhta. Dudaji’s eldest son, and Meera’s uncle, Rana Veeram Dev, ruled Medhta, while her father was given charge of a few nearby villages including Kukri. Meera’s mother was the daughter of Rana Sultan Singh of the princely Jhala Rajput family of Ratlam. Meera’s mother, Veer Kumari, was very devotional and Meera used to watch her mother in prayer and worship. Meera’s family were Vishnu worshipers. Her grandfather Dudaji constructed the Chaturbhuj Nath (a form of the deity Vishnu) temple. When Meera was around six years old her family went to visit a holy place in Gujarat and met with a saint there. He had with him a statue of Sri Krishna as Giridhari, with his left arm raised holding the Govardhan hill. When Meera Bai looked at the statue she went into a trance, as she was transported to her previous life as a Gopi. She remembered the time when she had watched Giridhari holding the mountain on His little finger. Meera believed she was the reincarnation of the Gopi Lalita. She fell in love with this statue that the saint carried and insisted she have it. The saint was rather startled and her father restrained her. At night, the saint had a dream, where Giridhari told him to give the statue to His dearest devotee, Meera. So the next day he did, realizing that Meera was very special to Krishn. This was Meera’s awakening as a devotee of Sri Krishn. For Meera the statue was alive, and He spoke to her. She would also see Sri Krishn in her dreams. Her deep and transcendental devotion would sprout spontaneous poems for Giridhari; these were divine conversations with her beloved. Her singing was so impregnated with devotion that those in her presence would be infused with devotion and go into higher states of devotional union. Over the years, Meera’s singing for Giridhari attracted many people to come and listen to her. When Meera was around 7 years old her mother died due to childbirth and this was a big blow to Meera. She felt as though love had left her life. She felt alone and destitute. Meera went into a deep sadness and wouldn’t eat or sleep, and cut herself off from others. Her father was very worried and was a broken man himself. After about a year and a half, her father also died in a battle. Now Meera had lost all the sources of unconditional love in her life. She felt helpless and alone in her grandfather’s palace. The consoling by relatives was of no avail. She clung to the statue of Giridhari, who was her only support now; she never let go of Him and kept Him in bed with her as she slept. Her family had a young maid for Meera, Mithula, who became a close companion in whom she would confide and who consoled Meera. Her uncle, Rao Veeram Dev, and his son, Rao Jai Mal, took great care of Meera, but Meera always felt alone. Her grandfather, Dudaji, was very loving and fond of Meera. He put extra attention on her education and learning. Meera was an intelligent girl and learned quickly. She wrote poems for her Giridhari with childlike innocence and love. She would also sing and dance to them, holding Giridhari in her hands. Meera used to love attending all the events where visiting saints would give sermons, or have Kirtans. Her single-pointed devotion and intensity grew more very quickly to a point where her mind was always occupied with devotional thoughts. She became known in and around Merta for her devotion towards Krishn. Meera was now thirteen and quite free spirited thanks to her grandfather’s love. Her aunt and uncle, Rao Veeram Dev, was a conservative man who didn’t believe in the rights of women; he felt strongly that Meera should get married. She did not want to get married but was pressured to marry the Mewar kingdom’s prince, Bhoj Raj, who was sixteen. Their wedding was in mid-April of 1511. He was the son of a very noble king, Rana Sangram Singh (Rana Sanga). Meera was very naive about worldly affairs, she didn’t know how to handle in-laws, what was politically correct, or how to behave as a queen. She was also not afraid of what people would think and was very strong willed. This nature of Meera in a very conservative setting of a Rajput royal family in the sixteenth century was the perfect recipe for controversy. Meera was not interested in married life. For her, no one existed except Krishna. The in-laws frowned on this unconventional girl and gossiped about her. Meera’s husband was a weak personality, and he didn’t protect her from the family’s antagonism, nor did he respect her devotion. Her father-in-law, however; did love and respect Meera and built a temple for her where she could worship her Giridhari. She spent most of her time in the temple and not at the palace with the family or nor did she behave like royal blood. Sant Rai Das (Ravi Das) came to Chittaur and Meera Bai gravitated towards him with a great thirst to learn. Guru Rai Das had exceptional knowledge and devotion towards the Lord, which attracted Meera, and she was soaked in bliss when she was with him. Guru Rai Das initiated Meera as a disciple. It was after this that she sang, "Payoji maine naam ratan dhan payo. Vastu amolik di mere Sat Guru, kiripa kar apanayo". "Naam" is when a Guru initiates a disciple with a mantra for meditation. Her in-laws did not allow Meera to meet Sant Rai Das because he was of a lower caste, but she used to meet him secretly with the help of Mithula. Meera always questioned the traditions and customs of her time using logic and Vedic knowledge. She defied the caste system as a malpractice. According to her, Guru Raidas was a Brahmin, not a Sudra. Meera’s husband died in a war a few years after they married when Meera was only sixteen. Her in-laws pressurized Meera to commit Sati, an extinct tradition now where widows jumped into a pyre and burnt to death. This was especially prevalent after the Muslims invaded Bharat. When a Hindu army lost a war, before the opposing army’s men could come and rape the women or take them as hostage slaves, the women would rather kill themselves through Sati. Meera refused to commit Sati, which aggravated her in-laws and royal pundits, but she was adamant that it was immoral to commit suicide, and after all, her eternal companion was Sri Krishn. After Meera’s husband died, she had one saving grace, her father-in-law. He was a principled man and loved Meera, and protected her from the other family members' attacks. However; even that shelter didn’t last long. She was around nineteen when her father-in-law also died. Meera's mother-in-law, sister-in-law, Uda, and brother-in-law, Vikramaditya, now king, were very cruel to Meera and tried to kill her. They wanted her to maintain the dignity of the family and act like a princess, not have a daily communion with ordinary people to sing bhajans, nor behave like a commoner. What angered them is that Meera was a rebel and an unconventional woman; she would speak back with what she thought was right or wrong. She refused to wear the veil over her head because she believed that was a custom introduced by the Muslims. This enraged her in-laws when she didn’t wear it in front of them and took it as a sign of disrespect. Her in-laws wanted to control her, and have her obey their demands and expectations, and confine her to the contemporary orthodox, narrow-minded society. But she didn’t fit the role of a typical woman, let alone that of a princess. She didn’t care how she dressed or looked. She always wore white, being a widow. She had very little interest in home affairs, or in worldly matters, because she had completely turned inwards. She never let go of her devotion for Krishna, no matter how much anyone threatened her. In the bleakest time of her life, when her in-laws rebuked her, and her own family didn't want her back, she sang the bhajan, "Mere to Giridhar Gopal dusaro na koi"—only Giridhar Gopal is truly my own and no other. I am wedded to that consciousness. The local society also did not approve of her unconventional ways, strong character and liberal views. She felt isolated, rejected, separated from everyone, and unloved…truly unloved. She was deeply pained and felt alone. This pain of abandonment made her devotion even more intense and single-pointed. She turned inwards more and more, immersed herself in devotion, and clung to her Giridhari - the only one who loved her unconditionally. “Teri mein to prem diwani, mero dard na jane koi” – I’m your mad lover, whose pain no one understands. Her only friend was Mithula, who was such a saving grace in her life. Mithula was also her scribe, as Meera used to go into a trance while singing for her Giridhari; Mithula used to write down the lyrics. I don't know why her life was full of so much misery. She contemplated suicide, she had nowhere to go and leaving the in-laws was unthinkable. She was perplexed and wrote a letter to Sant Goswami Tulsidas, the leading authority of Vedic Dharma at the time, describing her situation and asking him for his advice. He wrote back to Meera saying that those who do not love the Lord should be abandoned like a thousand enemies. Abuse should never be tolerated. Finally, when she was about twenty-one, she decided to leave her in-laws. One night, she left the fort of Chittaur with deep pain in her heart, mourning, "Why don't they understand that I love Him so much!" First, she went to Merta, where her uncle Rana Veeram Dev and cousin brother, Kuvar Rao Jai Mal, were ruling. Even though they welcomed her and took care of her, being orthodox themselves, they were not too comfortable with her leaving her in-laws and bringing shame to their family. Meera lived in Merta for a year, well taken care of. Though feeling mostly at home, she also felt rejected and betrayed by her family and missed having the unconditional love and acceptance of her late parents. She still could not fully and freely lead the spiritual life she wanted in the bounds of her family and was anxious to go to holy places, meet Gurus and saints and learn from them. She left Merta with Mithula and a band of travelers and for many days she traveled through the desert hungry and thirsty till she reached Vrindavan, the village where Sri Krishn spent his childhood with the Gopis. When she entered the Banke Bihari temple she erupted into singing, “Mharo Pranam Banke Bihari-ji,” and went into a trance looking at the idol. She spent some time in the birth town of Krishna, Mathura, and Vrindavan. As she had grown older her devotion had also matured from the innocence of childhood, to the adolescent worship of her idol Krishn, to a deeper understanding of who Sri Krishn was and the knowledge He gave. She wanted to find a Guru and gain knowledge. She heard about the Goswamis of Vrindavan who were disciples of the contemporary Saint Chaitanya Mahaprabhu. They were Krishn devotees as well as scholars of Vedic knowledge. She went to meet Jiv Goswami one evening, but he refused to talk to her, saying that she was a woman and not entitled to Vedic knowledge. Meera walked away singing, "I thought the only male (Purusha) is Krishna, the rest all female (Prakriti)," meaning there is only one consciousness, Krishna, and the rest is all creation. Struck by the deep knowledge in her words, Jiv Goswami retracted and called her back. This was followed by several sessions on Advaita Vedanta, and topics of deeper spiritual knowledge, between them. With her center in Vrindavan, she went to several pilgrimage places, including the ancient holy city of Kashi (Varanasi) where she met several saints including Sant Kabir, Sant Tulsidas, and Chaitanya Mahaprabhu. She spent time with Sant Tulsidas, hearing him sing great devotional poetry he wrote for Sri Ram, and drawn into it, she would also start singing with him. She was mesmerized by his devotion for Sri Ram and fascinated by his knowledge. It is then that Sri Ram also entered her heart. Meera Bai came during a time when the world was showered by devotional saints. I believe Meera also traveled to Punjab and met Guru Nanak Devji. Sant Vallabhacharya, Sant Surdas, and many other saints were contemporaries of Meera. Meera grew tired of the hypocrisy in Vrindavan and the treatment by the Pandas (temple priests) who were also jealous of her growing popularity. When she was around thirty, she left with Mithula for Dwarka in Gujarat, which had been the capital city of Sri Krishn's kingdom. Very little has been known or written about the years that Meera spent here in peace and happiness. Most people only know about her torturous years in Chittaur. In Mathura she gained great spiritual heights. She spent a lot of time in knowledge and meditation. She read the Vedanta of Sant Vallabhacharya whose works were popular at that time in Dwarka. She spent hours in meditation and higher states of consciousness. She attained divine union with her Giridhari. “Sanson ki maala pe simron mein pee ka naam. Prem ke rang mein aisee doobi, bun gaya aik hee roop. Prem ki mala japte japte aap bani mein Shyam”. On the garland of breaths, I recite my beloved’s name. Immersed so deeply into the essence of divine love, I’ve become one with my beloved. Chanting on the beads of devotion I’ve become You, my beloved Shyam. The locals hosted her well and she rose to fame. Many years later, her youngest brother-in-law, Udai Singh, had built a new capital for Mewar, called Udaipur, with beautiful palaces. By now Meera was known throughout Bharat, and he too heard great praises of her devotion and her songs had become so famous, and were heard all over. Udai wanted Meera to come back to Mewar, her in-laws’ home. Udai felt that great misfortune had fallen upon their family and kingdom after Meera left Chittor, so he sent a few people to Dwarka to convince her. She was happy in Dwarka and didn't want to go back. The priests said that they would fast unto death until she agreed to come back with them to Chittor. Perplexed, Meera didn’t know what to do. One night she entered the Dwarka Dheesh temple, and in her supreme glory, her single-pointed devotion and intense longing to unite with Him, she did. At that moment she ascended into a being of divine light. When the priests went in to look for her, all they found was her white Sari (garment). She left when she was around fifty.